Death is the end of life
by EpicShovel42069
Summary: Nico and Will get in huge arguments in front of other campers. Things get heated quickly. Progresses to more interactions between the two and their OOC friend Marqueese eventually.
1. chapter 1: The End of Beans

Chapter 1: The End of Beans

Nico was fucking hungry as shit. He looked everywhere throughout Camp Half Blood for something to eat. He would have even eaten Necca Wafers, which everyone knows are just coagulated dust that fell off of machinery in a black licorice factory. Eventually, in the Apollo cabin, he found a can of beans. He opened them, ready to eat, but there were no beans.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Nico yelled, "WHO THE HELL ATE ALL THE BEANS AND PUT THE CAN BACK?"

"I DID!" screamed a triumphant Will Solace, "I know you've come in here every night for the past week and stolen my fucking beans. I need to eat them for a medical condition, douchebag."

"I have a medical condition too." Nico explained, "The Demeter kids sold me some grass and now I have the munchies."

"Fuck you, asshole." Will replied.

"Ay, can y'all shut the fuck up please? I'm tryna sleep." Whispered Marqueese, another Apollo cabin member.

"We'll take it outside." Nico said ominously. Will walked out first, Nico following a few moments later. They stood outside the Apollo cabin, eyes locked, ready for a battle.

"I'm sorry I took your beans, man." Nico said, "I didn't know you needed them."

"It's cool bro." Will replied. "So, you eat ass?"

"Chill the fuck out, faggot." Nico answered.

"That's a very hurtful term." Will pouted, saddened.

"I'm sorry, I meant respected member of society who is in no way objectively different from a straight man." Nico offered.

"Thank you, that's perfect." Will responded.

"The hell was that?" Marqueese questioned, having witnessed the whole thing.


	2. chapter 2: The End of Baseball

Chapter 2: The End of Baseball

The campers at Camp Half Blood were having a gay old time when it was Will's turn to bat during a camp-wide game of baseball. The pitch was thrown perfectly, and Will hit the ball with all his strength. It sailed into the outfield, and hit Nico in the face.

"Hey, shithead, say 'heads up' next time." Nico told Leo Valdez, who was standing near him.

"I thought you were gonna catch it." Leo informed him.

"I'll beat your ass so hard that you'll have to call your father and tell him I'm your dad now." Nico told Leo.

"O...K..." Leo muttered, inching away from Nico.

"Suck it motherfuckers!" Will yelled, "While you were arguing I scored a home run bitch!"

"Shut the fuck up your dog is the closest anyone has ever felt to being attracted to you!" Nico yelled back.

"That's not what your mom said last night!" Will retorted.

"You know, the world would be a much better place if we all got along." Marqueese muttered, but nobody heard him.

"I killed your sister, but it made her too happy to be away from you that I brought her back." Will said.

"Bianca's alive?!" Nico asked hopefully.

"SIKE BITCH!" Will answered.

At that Nico pulled out his AK47. "You crossed me for the last time, asshole." Nico said, firing at Will.

"Ay, everybody chill the fuck out!" Marqueese yelled. Everyone fell silent. "Will, apologize to Nico, we all know you wanna fuck him. And Nico, you fucking shot Grover."

"Oh my lawd." Grover croaked as he died painfully.

"I'm sorry." Will and Nico said in unison. They shared a warm hug of love and regret.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD, WHYYYYYYY?!" Percy screamed, kneeling over Grover's corpse.

"What a fucking shitshow." Marqueese said.


	3. chapter 3: The End of Reading

Chapter 3: The End of Reading

Will was pretending to be reading when actually he was looking at some gay shit.

"What're you reading?" Nico asked, seeing Will sitting alone by a tree.

"Nothing." Will told him.

Nico grabbed the book, and looked inside to see it was just porn.

"Ugh, what the fuck?" Nico gagged as he barfed all over Will.

"Thanks, man. That's my secret fetish." Will replied. Nico ran away to tell the other campers his experience.

"Guys, Will was looking at a book of gay porn and then told me his fetish was people puking on him!" Nico yelled into Jason's ear, who was just enjoying his lunch with Marqueese.

"Why the fuck would I want to know that?" Jason asked.

"And don't you think that was something Will shared with you privately?" Marqueese added.

A few hours later, Will approached Nico, tears filling his eyes.

"Did you tell everyone about my vomit fetish?" Will choked.

"Yeah, fucknut." Nico responded. Will fell to the ground sobbing. Campers began to gather around to see what happened.

"Nico, what did you do to him?" Jason asked.

"Nothing. He just isn't comfortable with himself." Nico said. Will got up and stared Nico in the eye.

"Your... mom... gay." Will spat.

"No, you." Nico replied as he pulled out a glock and fired randomly. Screams of terror were drowned out by the sound of gunshots.

"Ay, cut that shit out, cunt muffin." Marqueese said.

"I'll kill you too nig-" Nico began before Marqueese punched his lights out.

"NOOOOOOOOOO, WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUCK?!" Percy screamed, hunched next to the bodies of Annabeth and Jason.

"Every fucking day." Marqueese muttered.


End file.
